Bad bad day...8dp3dt

It is so gloomy outside today...which fits my mood perfectly...It is impossible to stay optimistic...It's so hard to let myself believe that I could be pregnant, when there's a 50 percent chance that I'm not.  Today I started having period type cramping, headaches, and think I'm trying to start spotting...This can't be good...At this point I don't want to even go for my beta on Tuesday... This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, besides my husband's cancer diagnosis.  Infertility is not fair.  It's just not.... I thank God every day for my husband's great health, but I wish infertility wasn't a side effect from the medicines to make him better.  It's the sad truth that most of the time it is... If you are reading this, say a prayer for us..That no matter what the outcome, we will be okay.