Today I just feel..

Today I just feel….

Today I just feel numb.  When battling infertility, you have to train yourself to become numb, in a sense.  You battle a number of different emotions during the process.  Some days I am so angry that I feel like I could strangle any and every fertile woman out there.  (that is something considering as far as we know, I am super fertile.)  Other days, I’m so sad, that dragging myself out of bed and getting ready to face the day just wears me down.  On the rare occasion, I am actually able to look at a baby bump, or a newborn, and think “someday that will be me.”  Then there are days like today..days when the only word that could possibly be used to describe my mood would be numb… I am impartial..I am just going through the motions until 5 o’clock so I can go home and shut myself up away from everything.