IVF #2: New Journey, New Protocol, New Nerves!!

So, when we first discovered that IVF would be our route to parenthood, I never imagined it would be a long, drawn out route.  I am usually the eternal optimist.  I guess I told myself that IF we had one failure, the next round would be less nerve wrecking, less stressful, less...well, scary.  I would know what to expect, how I would respond, how I would feel.  Boy, have I gotten a slap in the face...I was so, so, so wrong.  Now that we are a few months away from getting ready to "try" again, I am terrified.  I want to be sick.  I want to run away..I want to wake up from this bad dream.  I have a whole new protocol (another post for another day).  Now knowing the heartache of failed IVF, and still not being completely healed....I do not want to face that again.  Not knowing how I will respond to new meds....and some other issues that I will probably never post about...Geesh..I know it sounds like I am complaining and whining..and I guess I am...but can't I just catch a break every now and again?